10 Things You Might Be Grateful For About Your Husband

September 12, 2022 Marriage

10 Things You Might Be Grateful For About Your Husband

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بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

There are many things I love about my husband. If your husband has all these qualities of a good man, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. As for you beautiful single ladies, take this as an inspiration for you to picture your future marriage insyaAllah. 🙂

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What you will learn

1. He sees ALL my flaws and still loves me

There is only one person in this world with whom you will never be able to cover your flaws, and that would be your husband. Not even your mum knows all your deepest and darkest secrets. If you’re lucky enough to have your husband as a best friend, you can confide in him, let out all your insecurities and after knowing all that about you, he will still stick with you no matter what.

That is true love, my friend. I pray you will find your best life partner too insyaAllah. Ameen.

When you hate that your cheeks look like they’re going to explode, he says he loves them. When you work too hard thinking it defines your worth, he reminds you that you’re good enough just by pleasing Allah.

That’s the kind of man you need to be looking out for as your husband. 😉

2. His money is my money, my money is mine

Men are the caretakers of women, as men have been provisioned by Allah over women and tasked with supporting them financially. (An-Nisa 4:34)

I love that Allah emphasized in the Quran that men are leaders of women, they have to provide for their women, take care of all their needs as best they can and treat them with the best treatment.

Husbands are supposed to cover all the household expenses of those under his care.

We don’t have to lift a finger to provide for ourselves. But of course, no woman in her right mind would want to sit idly at home doing nothing, especially in this day and age where you can practically make money with any kind of skill you have and you don’t even have to go out of the house.

So this leaves us with our own savings to use on our own expense. Husbands have no right over our money whatsoever. But if you want to be like Khadijah RA, then you can use your money to spread Islam or contribute to your household expenses as sadaqah.

3. He takes care of all the house chores that I hate

In every household, there needs to be a good amount of give and take, or else someone would definitely be resentful since they’re doing all the work. My husband and I divide the house chores equally.

But even so, he doesn’t mind doing most of it without being told. Alhamdulillah. He does the laundry every Monday, washes the pots and pans after I finish cooking, maintains and washes the car, the whole shebang.

‘Aishah (May Allah be pleased with her) was asked: “What did Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) used to do inside his house?” She answered: “He used to keep himself busy helping members of his family, and when it was the time for Salat (the prayer), he would get up for prayer.” [Al-Bukhari].

I honestly dread husbands that never help around the house (I’ve met them so I know). If you want to make sure your future husband is not one of them, ask his siblings/family members if he helps around the house.

If he doesn’t, it would take a bit of effort to train him in your early days of marriage because he’s not used to it. (He’s been living like a prince where mommy takes care of him and suddenly you want to turn him into an unpaid maid? Come on girl)

It’s not impossible though, it just takes more effort in the beginning. If you insist, he can’t resist.

4. He is my life teacher

… the best of you are those who are best to your women.” (Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1162)

I married my husband at the early age of 22 and he was 29. So naturally, he was much more mature than I was. There were many things he had to teach me and correct me in those days.

Even the smallest things like the correct way to sweep the floor and putting the towel away to keep the room clean.

In a way, he was my teacher that helped me navigate through my 20s. 🙂 And I’m so grateful for that Alhamdulillah.

Now, looking back after 5 years of marriage, I can clearly see the immense level of patience he had for me all these years. SubhanAllah. May Allah reward him with Jannatul Firdaus.

And you know what, his name is Firdaus so I hope he really does get into Jannatul Firdaus. Ameen. 🥰🌹

I can’t believe I thought I was much more mature than most people my age. Maybe in the broader sense like life plans and family goals. But when it comes to the nitty-gritty details of being a homemaker, I was totally left out of my wits.

5. His manly smell turns me on

Your spouses are a garment for you as you are for them. (Al-Baqarah 2:187)

It’s important to be deeply attracted to your husband. This is the man you will wake up to, share a bed with and insyaAllah live your whole life with.

You need to find him attractive. It’s not shallow to think so. For me, the best thing about my husband is his smell. I can’t seem to get enough of those pheromones of his for some reason.

Even when he’s sweaty or he just got back from work, I still find his pheromones amazing. Isn’t that the weirdest thing?

And I’m the type who is rarely attracted to people’s smells. Most men I’ve come across have the most awful smell, almost foul. So Alhamdulillah, with the one man I’m supposed to live the rest of my life with insyaAllah, Allah allowed me to be super attracted to his smell even when I’ve never really come close to him before marriage.

So, the moral of the story is to trust Allah in your process of finding a spouse. If you go about it the right way that pleases Him, insyaAllah He will unite you with someone He is also pleased with insyaAllah. 🙂

6. He brings me closer to Allah

Whether you conceal what is in your hearts or reveal it, it is known to Allah. (Ali Imran 3:29)

This is definitely one of the things I love most about my husband. You know how sometimes our eman decides to take a nosedive and we’re left feeling super lazy to do any ibadahs? You feel awful for not being able to be the best slave of Allah but you just can’t seem to find the strength to pick yourself up.

This is when your pious husband comes in handy. Alhamdulillah, my husband is very gentle with me during these times. He would nudge me up for Tahajjud, ask me to pray with him and give a big hug right after.

A lot of the little things just fill my heart.

And when I have questions about the deen or he finds interesting Islamic lectures on youtube, we would discuss them and increase each other’s knowledge together.

So you see, putting the deen first as a criterion to get a spouse is super important. You either grow together towards Jannah or you drag each other to hell nauzubillah. There’s rarely an in-between.

A truly pious husband would follow the way of Prophet Muhammad SAW when dealing with his wife. He will be the best husband for you insyaAllah.

Look at his character first. The rest comes later.

7. He genuinely cares for me

And one of His signs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves so that you may find comfort in them. And He has placed between you compassion and mercy. Surely in these are signs for people who reflect. (Ar-Rum 30:21)

My husband is my best friend, I can confidently say that because there’s no one who cares for me quite as he does. Of course, my mum and dad love me to bits Alhamdulillah but his love is different.

Despite having no blood ties with me whatsoever, he is able to put aside his ego, genuinely look at my needs and meet them as best he could even after 5 years of marriage. That is truly amazing masyaAllah.

I hope I’m carrying my end of the bargain as well. It scares me to think that my sacrifices may not be up to par with his. The imbalance can definitely ruin our marriage in the future.

But that’s the beauty of marriage. The best marriages are the ones where both husband and wife are racing to please each other. They look like two butterflies beautifully dancing in courtship.

It has to be an equal reciprocative effort or else one party will inevitably be left resentful and feeling alone.

8. He makes me laugh

I don’t know how he does it. One minute he’s my charismatic leader who orders me around and the next thing I know he is this goofy clown that makes the silliest jokes.

I mean, what? How does he do it?

I think this is definitely one of the traits that I admire most in him. The fact that he is able to be a balanced person and not take life too seriously, is just amazing.

Sure, we need to take life seriously when it calls for it, but we must also remember that we’re human beings with many feelings and emotions.

There are times we need to laugh and enjoy ourselves and there are times we need to be serious and live up to certain standards.

Only when we are able to balance and go through each of these unique feelings in our lives can we truly mature and become holistically well-rounded people.

It is not Allah’s Will to burden you, but to purify you and complete His favor upon you, so perhaps you will be grateful. (Al-Baqarah 5:6)

9. He plans everything with me at the center of it

verily Allah loves kindness in every matter… (Sahih Muslim 2165a)

As his wife, my husband knows that his primary duty is to make me feel as comfortable as possible being under his care. And so whenever he makes decisions, like planning a trip, adjusting his schedule or choosing items in the house, whatever it is, he would prioritize my needs to make sure it suits me.

And of course, I would do the same. 🙂

These things can show in the smallest things and the heftiest of decisions like who should throw the garbage and all the way up to buying a house.

The best part is, I have a say in every decision and he values my opinions. Now that’s what a good leader looks like, ladies. Even when sometimes my opinions may not be the best moving forward, we can discuss them diplomatically until we both come to a unified decision that makes us both satisfied. It’s a win-win.

I’ve seen husbands and wives who don’t value each other’s opinions and just make decisions without consulting each other. It is very dangerous.

Imagine getting into a business partnership and your partner says, ‘I’m going to do whatever I want with this company and you don’t have a say in it whatsoever.’ What kind of partnership is that?

A good leader always considers the opinion of the people under his care, from there he will make the best decision that fulfills the needs of all parties.

10. He is the big brother to my younger brothers

“None of you believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.” (Jami` at-Tirmidhi 2515)

One day, when my whole family was visiting my grandma on the weekends, my husband took my teen brother out for a walk around the block.

Perhaps he knew something was bothering him and so he wanted to help.

My brother confided in him how he was having trouble choosing a career path that’s suitable for him. It was eating at his heart because he felt pressured to make sure he was choosing the right path.

My husband gave him some brotherly advice. At the end of the day when we were all parting ways, my brother hugged my husband tightly and said ‘thank you abang (brother in Malay)’ as if a weight has been lifted off his shoulders.

My husband later told me about this when we were on our way back home from the visit.

I felt my heart bloom for this man in an instant. SubhanAllah. What a noble thing he did. I can’t believe I hit a jackpot with this man. Alhamdulillah. Woohoo!

Sometimes men need to have their own heart-to-heart talk too just like we women do. But since men are more private about their struggles, they need someone whom they’re truly comfortable and trusting to talk to. More so than we women do.

I’m so glad my husband is able to be that big brother figure to my brothers Alhamdulillah. It is truly a blessing subhanAllah.

Conclusion

Are you inspired to find your own prince charming? I sure hope so. That’s why I wrote this list of 10 Things I Love About My Husband’. 🙂 May Allah give us the best spouses to be our partner till Jannah insyaAllah.

Love and Salam,

Aimi