THE KHALIFAH DIARIES Be The Best Muslimah For Allah SWT

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ

Khadijah R.A was the first and only woman Rasulullah SAW married monogamously for 25 years. All his other wives were in a polygamous marriage with him. And she was the first person to embrace Islam and support Rasulullah SAW’s prophethood when no one knew what Islam was.

In other words, she was his backbone from the very beginning. 

Talk about the ideal wife! 

You know what they say :”Behind every powerful man, there’s an amazing woman”.

Personally, Khadijah R.A is my favorite woman in seerah. She is the perfect depiction of the perfect wife. Rasulullah SAW loved her more than all his other wives.

And Allah SWT and Jibril A.S gave their salams to her personally:

Gabriel came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said, “O Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ)! This is Khadija coming to you with a dish having meat soup (or some food or drink). When she reaches you, greet her on behalf of her Lord (i.e. Allah) and on my behalf, and give her the glad tidings of having a Qasab palace in Paradise wherein there will be neither any noise nor any fatigue (trouble).” -[Bukhari]

And not only that. Rasulullah SAW mentioned her as one of the best women in history. MasyaAllah.

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Mary, the daughter of `Imran, was the best among the women (of the world of her time) and Khadija is the best amongst the women. (of this nation). -[Bukhari]

So, what can we do in our time to be an amazing woman and wife just like Khadijah R.A?

Let’s see…

1. She was a sincere lover

Have you ever met a woman whom her husband loved so much? 

Too much to the point that even after her death, her husband still mentions her often until one of his younger wives got so jealous of her even though she has never met her.

Narrated `Aisha:

I never felt so jealous of any wife of Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) as I did of Khadija because Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) used to remember and praise her too often and because it was revealed to Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) that he should give her (Khadija) the glad tidings of her having a palace of Qasab in Paradise. (Bukhari)

Ma sha Allah. Amazing right?

Khadijah R.A loved Rasulullah SAW sincerely with all her heart. It was as if she had no ulterior motives whatsoever.

In a time where the prophet was young and was not as wealthy as her, she did not hesitate to ask for the Prophet SAW’s hand in marriage because she fell in love with who he was.

His character, not his possessions. 

And when the norm was that men were supposed to propose to the women, she went ahead and proposed to him (in the right way, through a mahram of course 😉 ). 

Her character is undeniably beautiful. Ma sha Allah.

Lesson:

In our modern time, we can learn from Khadijah R.A by not putting our future husband’s wealth as the highest criteria for marriage. 

Of course, the couple should have a reasonable amount of possession to sustain their lives, but if the wife has enough wealth and the husband has good character and a strong cause, it is perfectly fine to get married and share the finances between them.

May Allah make us sincere lovers to our husbands as well. Ameen.

2. She was wise

Khadijah R.A’s ability to make the right decisions in life shows how wise she was.

When Jibril A.S first exposed himself to Rasulullah SAW on mount Hira’, Rasulullah SAW was so scared that he thought he was going insane. 

But when he got home to Khadijah R.A, she comforted him and assured him that a man with his noble character will never be humiliated by God. She knew just the right words to

give her husband strength and courage to continue his journey even though she herself wasn’t fully sure what was going on at that moment.

Khadija replied, “Never! By Allah, Allah will never disgrace you. You keep good relations with your kith and kin, help the poor and the destitute, serve your guests generously and assist the deserving calamity-afflicted ones.” (Bukhari)

If I was in her place, I probably wouldn’t be that calm and be terrified myself. 😉

But being the wise woman that she was, she knew exactly what to do. 🙂 SubhanAllah.

She brought Rasulullah SAW to her blind cousin, Waraqah Ibn Nawfal who was a religious Christian who did not worship idols at the time. He revealed to them that according to old scriptures, Rasulullah SAW had signs of becoming a Prophet and that he will be strongly despised by his people.

Knowing the truth, she encouraged Rasulullah SAW to dedicate his life to preaching Islam and leave his caravan business career.

Lesson:

Sometimes, we forget that our husbands are weak human beings too. No matter how strong and brave he is, there will be times when he will lose his motivation, doubt himself and fall into despair. This is when he will need his beloved wife the most. To give him strength, comfort and validation.

Allah SWT does not ask much of us, ladies. We just have to be the best loving wives to our husbands and our place in Jannah will be guaranteed. In sya Allah. 

“Whichever woman dies while her husband is pleased with her, then she enters Paradise.” (Tirmidhi)

So, make sure you choose a husband you firmly love and can be loyal to for the rest of your life in sha Allah. Because your Jannah depends on it. 🙂

3. She was a believer

If your husband comes to you and introduces you to a foreign religion that no one has ever heard of, would you believe him?

Probably not.

But that’s not what Khadijah R.A did. MashaAllah.

Knowing full well how beautiful the character of Prophet Muhammad SAW was and how truthful he was in every matter, there was NO WAY that she couldn’t believe him.

So, she became the first person to embrace Islam and believed in her husband. Ma sha Allah.

Lesson:

In life, there are many things that are uncertain – our career, our life decisions, our family plans etc. Decisions need to be made all the time and sometimes, even with the best action plan, the road ahead can be scary. 

As the leader of the family, your husband will have to make most of these decisions himself. The best you can do as his wife is to believe in him and trust that he is making the best decision for the family. 

I’m not saying blindly believing in him though. If something doesn’t seem right, you should most definitely consult him and discuss the matter. 

But if there are things that can be achieved, and the only missing ingredient is faith, he will need that little bit of encouragement from his most faithful cheerleader – YOU, his wife. 🙂

May Allah make us the most faithful believer to our husband. Ameen 🙂

4. She supported him

Khadijah R.A was a wealthy woman who inherited her father’s caravan business. When Prophet Muhammad SAW became a prophet, she used all her wealth to support his cause in spreading Islam. 

Lesson:

When we support our husband, we should support him with everything we have – love, kindness, strength, wit, money and resources etc. 

Although in Islam, the husband is responsible for all the finances in the marriage, if the wife has more than enough to support her husband in any worthy cause, that could be her ticket to Jannah. 🙂

Allah SWT knows who has done their best in this dunya and no good deed will ever go unrewarded in Allah’s eyes. So, rest assured that you will be rewarded abundantly by Him. Just like Khadijah R.A in sha Allah 🙂

5. She was a smart business woman

In a marketplace where most businesses were dominated by the men, Khadijah R.A was one of the wealthiest leaders in the caravan business in Mecca. After her father – Khuwaylid’s death, she took over the family business and had many employees working for her.

Rasulullah SAW was one of her employees before and after they got married. His excellent character in handling her business made her propose to him for marriage.

Lesson:

Women can most definitely succeed in their career! Even Rasulullah’s most beloved wife is a successful business woman. So ladies, don’t be afraid to pursue your dreams. We, women are made to be amazing in the home and outside the home. 

No matter what career we choose, whether business, or any noble profession, let’s purify our intention to do everything solely to please Allah.

That way, we can be successful both in dunya and akhirah in sya Allah.

May Allah make us all successful in our chosen careers. 🙂 Ameen.

6. She had 6 of his children

Rasulullah SAW had 7 children in his lifetime, 6 with Khadijah R.A. and 1 with a slave girl called Maria Al-Qibitiyah. As you can see, most of his children were from Khadijah R.A. 

There was an incident where Aisha R.A was so jealous of Khadijah R.A that she called her… things she wasn’t supposed to. 😉

Narrated ‘Aisha:

Once Hala bint Khuwailid, Khadija’s sister, asked the permission of the Prophet (ﷺ) to enter. On that, the Prophet (ﷺ) remembered the way Khadija used to ask permission, and that upset him. He said, “O Allah! Hala!” So I became jealous and said, “What makes you remember an old woman amongst the old women of Quraish an old woman (with a teethless mouth) of red gums who died long ago, and in whose place Allah has given you somebody better than her?” (Bukhari)

When Rasulullah SAW heard this, he replied…

“Khadijah was such and such (commending her and speaking well of her), and I had children from her.” (Bukhari & Muslim) 

Lesson:

Having children is a blessing as well as an amanah. They are a blessing because they are the coolness of our eyes, our source of joy and comfort in life. 

“Our Lord! Grant unto us wives and offspring who will be the coolness of our eyes.” (25:74)

They are an amanah because as parents, we are responsible to mold them and raise them into a great Muslim the best way we can.

I don’t have children of my own yet. But I hope we’ll have them when we’re ready in sha Allah :).

I suppose your husband will appreciate you more when you have his children. I’ve heard stories of how after having seen the difficulties of labor, husbands appreciated their wives on a whole new level.

May Allah give us children that are the coolness of our eyes and may they grow into amazing Muslims and Muslimahs that uphold Allah’s beautiful religion.

Ameen.

Final thoughts on Khadijah R.A

Ladies, our goal in life is to get to Jannah the best way we can. 

So, what better way is there than to learn from the woman whom Allah has guaranteed Jannah for her?

May we all be more like Khadijah R.A. Ameen. InsyaAllah 🙂

Any good from this article is from Allah and any evil is from the shaytaan and me. May Allah forgive our shortcomings in practicing His deen.

Wa billahi tawfeeq wa hidayah

(All successes come from Allah and His guidance).